Have you ever said this about your relationship: “It wasn’t like this at all in the beginning…he or she was loving, fun, caring, romantic…” You fell in love with someone that made you feel incredibly special; they charmed you; they were kind - everything you hoped for in a relationship. They convinced you that they were trustworthy, and you gave your heart over to this person who was like no one else you had ever met. The heart-breaking truth though is, they really are like no one you’ve ever met. They created that person to hook you. They “love-bombed” you – showering you with love, admiration, and attention - to draw you in. Love bombing sets up the groundwork for manipulation. That’s not who they really are; that person you fell in love with sadly doesn’t even exist; it was an illusion that a person with Narcissistic personality disorder NEEDS you to believe they are because they need you to fill their needs.

Once an Narcissist knows that they have you hooked, they go back to their selfish, cruel ways, and you stand there hurt and don’t have any idea what happened; “It wasn’t like this in the beginning...he or she was loving, fun, caring, romantic…” What happened!?

Over time, they convince you that it is your ‘reaction’ to their behavior that is the problem, rather than their abusive behavior. We often spend a lot of time trying to make ourselves better, only to have the lies and manipulation continue to spiral downhill, until you are left not recognizing who you are anymore. It is degrading and painful.

Being in ANY kind of a relationship with someone who has narcissistic personality disorder is destructive, but you can learn to be your own self again, have joy again – maybe for the first time, and know that you have value and worth. If you need help in these areas, please reach out: 719-375-4622.